So, someone has asked to borrow money.
We have all felt used from time to time in our life, and it can leave us feeling so bad about ourselves and the people around us.
The good news is that we can work to make it impossible for someone to try and use us again. That’s what this video is all about! Here are the main points and tips to stop anyone from ever taking advantage of you again.
Boundaries: Set up healthy boundaries with people in your life so that they know what’s okay with you and what isn’t. It sounds simple, but it can take time and practice. A great place to start is to notice when someone makes you uncomfortable or easily upset. That’s your minds way of telling you that they have crossed one of your boundaries. So take note, and set them up accordingly.
Toxic relationships: If someone tries to convince you or manipulate you into doing things for them, or you find that you are the only one in the relationship who gives of yourself, then that relationship is toxic. You should try to communicate to this person what your boundaries are and if they can’t abide by them then we may have to stop seeing this person all together.
I hope this was helpful and stops any of us from being taken advantage of. Saying no is completely okay and acceptable! xox
Here’s the question from today’s video:
As you know I work a lot and study part time outside of work hours/weekends. I’m doing it like that as I’m paying for my degree myself without loans to start with and my parents haven’t supported me financially since I was 15…… but that makes it hard because I obviously earn a lot more than my friends my age. Some are students who don’t work/barely work. Others work in low paying jobs because that’s all they can get…. And so sometimes I am way too nice to them… in regards to a lot of things but in this context buying them things and helping them out when they sometimes need it. However there have been a few occasions recently of people saying they need help and they’ll pay me back but I’m still waiting – one has been about a year now. And I just constantly find that I’m fighting with myself over it. Because I want to help, and most of the time I am able to help. But it starts to get to a point where it feels like they take advantage of that and are only friends with me because of stuff like that. So I just don’t really know how to get around all of that… yet another case of constantly fighting myself… :-/ ugh.
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I’m Kati Morton, a licensed therapist making Mental Health videos!
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