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182 Running from myself.
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First of all I love the photo...how powerful!! and so true...recovering and even just dealing with and ED can feel like we are running from ourselves. That's why the ED voice vs healthy voice and journaling can help us try to separate the two so that we can begin to remember who we are without our EDs:) Thank you so much for such a powerful post:) <3
Kati Morton recently posted..Running from myself.
deviantart.com for the photo they have a huge selection of artwork by thousands of people :) So true and because they sounds the same just albeit more angry or scared the are basically the same so what's right and wrong is a mystery sometimes. I honestly think I'm naturally in self destruct mode and I'm constantly trying to fight that to the detriment of pretty much everything in my 'life' Thanks for the reply :) <3
Sorry for all the typos I just reread that and I am majorly embarrassed!!
Wow, this is brilliant!
You should keep writing, it's such a great way to express self.
I love your line "time has passed me by again, I am slipping away'
It's so perfect, I can totally relate to it, honestly every time I read that line I really feel it within myself (as creepy as that sounds lol).
I also love the way you talk about the 'danger' - I can relate to it with the ed, like how it's always, always there.
If you don't mind, how old are you? (Im 17 btw)
Thanks you so much! :)
It really is, its very soothing just the feeling of putting them words on paper it removes some of that energy almost
Not creepy at all! I know that feeling and its a great one when you find something that makes sense that sums up your emotions, I find music a great resource just for that! :)
Exactly! I don't know if this makes sense to you but for me its very similar to the feeling of someone watching you...??
I'm 18, I'll be 19 soon at the end of the month :) When do you turn 18? :)
Hey!
Yes, music is amazing for summing up emotions and thoughts.
I'm going to post a list of my favourite songs soon, in categories like 'ed recovery' and 'for anxiety'... Maybe you could do the same? :)
Do you write poetry much?
I find for me it's sort of an impulsive thing, like I'll write lots when I get the urge, and then won't write any for a while... :D
Wow, I never thought of the ed in terms of feeling someone is watching you, however that does make a lot of sense of me.
I usually explain it to myself in very metaphorical terms, such as being surrounded by really thick fog or being fully at war within myself.
Sometimes I think the physical effects; like weight loss, etc, are really irrelevant side effects of the actual mental war that's going on. It's weird how the physical effects are the only ones that show...
Oh, happy birthday for the end of the month!!
I'm 18 in April :)
Are you at uni?
Yeah sure my taste in music is pretty all over the place though lol
I'm exactly the same sometimes I write non-stop and then I don't write for ages!!
Great metaphors totally get where your coming from with those :)
They really are your mentally exhausted and going insane with frustration long before you feel any particularly dramatic physical side effects really!!
Thanks :) Cool :)
No I'm not I had to drop out last year as I had to go into hospital. Probably the best thing that could have happened though because the course was really burning me out mentally. I'm doing a course from September for a year to get the extra points (credits) to go and do a different course at a different Uni :)
What about you? :)
Oh, and the artwork is amazing!
Is there an ED section on Deviantart?
Its all done by tags so just search eating disorders ;)
Hey! Sorry I didn't reply for ages, I have been meaning to!
My music taste is totally all over the place as well - I love a variety of genres and artists. I swear, music is the best thing in my life. It is my voice, my comfort, it calms me down.
I am a rather dramatic person if you didn't gather that from the metaphors :)
Oh, I'm sorry to hear you had to go into hospital.
Your course to get credits for Uni sounds like a really positive move - I'm really hopeful for you! Trying for a different course at a different Uni sounds good as well. Do you have a vague idea of what you might do then? Dream job?
I'm still at school. As for a job, to be honest I've always wanted to be a spy, like MI5 or whatever :P
But I'll probably do a bachelor of arts / bachelor of science conjoint, majoring in psychology, IT and politics. And be a clinical psychologist or some sort of intelligence investigator :)
What are your interests and passions?
How's your recovery going at the moment?
I'm from NZ, wbu?
Oh, check out this site for lols: http://edlifeprobs.tumblr.com/